IslamQA

Answers to questions received on my islamic-art-and-quotes tumblr blog.

It is permissible for menstruating women to enter mosques and to stay there for lectures

A fatwa from the Palestinian scholar Dr. Husam al-Din Afana, professor at Jerusalem University [view Arabic original]

Question: Is it permissible for a menstruating woman to enter a mosque to attend a lecture?

According to most jurists it is impermissible for a menstruating woman to enter mosques and their main evidence against it is the hadith from Aisha that the Prophet said: “The mosque is not halal for a menstruating woman or for a ritually impure [junub] person.” (Narrated by Abu Dawud and Ibn Maja). There has been much debate about this hadith’s chain of narrators, as will be explained.

Some jurists also used the following verse as evidence against allowing menstruating women to enter mosques:

O you who believe! Do not approach the prayer while you are drunk, so that you know what you say; nor in a state of ritual impurity—unless you are travelling... (The Quran, verse 4:43).

Despite the fact that this verse does not specifically mention menstruation, they related it to ritual impurity.

Another group of jurists has the opinion that it is permissible for for a menstruating woman to enter mosques. This was the opinion of Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal according to a saying of him narrated by al-Muzani, the companion of Imam al-Shafi`i. Imam Dawud and Ibn Hazm, both of whom belong to the Zahiri school of thought, also share this opinion.

Sheikh Husam al-Din Afana (center)

Imam Ahmad says in a different narration that it is permissible for a menstruating woman to enter a mosque if she performs ablution and is sure that she will not have any accidents. See the Insaf, volume 1, p. 347.

The hadith scholar Sheikh Nasir al-Din al-Albani preferred this opinion as mentioned in his Tamam al-Minna, p. 119. I find this view the most satisfactory, therefore my view is that it is permissible for a menstruating woman to enter a mosque to attend lectures.

The evidence for this view is as follows:

1. Original purity: The basic principle is that entering mosques is forbidden to no one. There is no clear and explicit piece of evidence that prohibits menstruating women from entering mosques. Imam al-Nawawi says: “The best that this school of thought directs one to is that the basic principle is non-prohibition. A person who says it is forbidden does not have a clear and explicit piece of evidence.” (Al-Majmu`, vol 2, p. 160)

Sheikh al-Albani says: “Our view on this question is the same as on the issue of touching the Quran in a state of ritual impurity; which is to assume purity by default, and to recognize that there is no evidence to prohibit it, as Imam Ahmad and others have said.” (Tamam al-Minna, p. 119).

2. There is a great deal of disagreement on the hadith that the majority has used as evidence, which says “The mosque is not halal for a menstruating woman or for a ritually impure [junub] person.” That is because its narrator is Aflat bin Khalifa from Jasra (?) bint Dujaja, both of whom are considered unreliable [da`eef] by many hadith scholars, such as al-Khattabi, al-Bayhaqi, Abd al-Haq al-Ishbili and Ibn Hazm. It is also related from Imam Ahmad that he considered them unreliable.

Imam al-Baghawi says: “Imam Ahmad and al-Muzani considered it permissible to stay in there [i.e. at a mosque] and Ahmad considered the hadith unsound [da`eef] because its narrator, who is Aflat bin Khalifa, is unknown [majhul] and he interpreted the verse [4:43] as referring to travelers who need to make dry ablution [tayammum] in order to pray, as has been narrated from Ibn Abbas.” (Sharh al-Sunna, vol 2., p. 46).

Imam al-Albani mentions that

Al-Bayhaqi says it is not a strong [narration]."

Abd al-Haq al-Ishbili says [regarding the hadith]: "It is not proven [to be sound]." Ibn Hazm goes to an extreme, saying: "It is baseless."

The hadith has two supporting narrations [shawahid] that do not increase its soundness because their chains contain wholly unreliable narrators. (Tamam al-Minna, p. 119)

Al-Albani also mentions it as unsound in Irwaa’ al-Ghalil vol. 1, p. 162.

Imam al-Nawawi considers the hadith unsound in his book Khulasat al-Ahkam, where he includes this narration among the unsound narrations that relate to the issue of ritual impurity and menstruation. (Khulasat al-Ahkam, vol. 1, p. 206-210).

Ibn Hajar says regarding Aflat bin Khalifa that he is of unknown reliability. (al-Talkhis al-Habir, vol. 1, p. 140).

Al-Khattabi says: “They [referring to previous hadith scholars] considered this hadith unsound and said that its narrator Aflat is unknown, therefore the hadith is not fit to be used in evidence.” (Ma`aalim al-Sunna, vol. 1, p. 67.)

He also considered the hadith, as it is narrated in Ibn Maja’s collection, to be unsound, saying: “Its chain of narrators is unsound because Makhduj’s reliability is not verified, and Abu al-Khattab is unknown.” (Sunan Ibn Maja, vol. 1, p. 212)

Imam al-Bukhari mentions in his al-Majmu` (vol. 2, p. 160) that “Jasara has some strange narrations,” a statement that has been considered by many scholars as a judgment of unsoundness about this hadith.

Ibn Hazm considered the hadith unsound in all of its narrations, saying [regarding the narrators]: “All of this is baseless, for Aflat has little fame and his reliability is unknown,  while Makhduj’s hadiths are to be abandoned since he narrates riddles from Jasara. And Abu l-Khattab al-Hijri is unknown, while Ataa’ bin a-Khaffat is Ataa’ bin Muslim whose hadiths are munkar [questionable]. Isma`il is unknown and Muhammad bin al-Hasan has been called a liar and Kathir bin Zayd likewise. Therefore everything in this hadith is fasle.” (Al-Muhallaa, vol. 1, p. 401)

It should however be mentioned that many scholars considered this hadith hasan [not reaching the level of soundness, but considered to be worth narrating]. See Nasb al-Raaya, vol. 1, p. 194.

3. What strengthens the opinion on permitting menstruating women to enter mosques is the general meaning of the Prophet’s saying : “Muslims never become najis [ritually polluted].” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).

4. Another fact that supports permissibility is that the scholars permit non-believers to enter mosques whether male or female. A Muslim should be given preference even if ritually impure, and a Muslim woman, even if menstruating, over non-believers.

5. Another fact that supports permissibility is what al-Bukhari and Muslim narrate in the story of the black woman who used to live in a tent inside the mosque of the Prophet .

In short, it is permitted for menstruating women to enter mosques seeking knowledge if they are sure not to cause the mosque to become dirty, since women have a crucial need for knowledge and learning about religion.

This is a shortened and paraphrased translation.

Why are Muslim men so judgmental about what a woman wears?

This is a topic that really gets on my nerves but I need an insight from a males perspective. Why is it Muslim men are the first ones to criticise Muslim women? Whether it be about how's she's dressed or how her hijaab is worn. I just feel that the majority of men do it as a control thing.

That is not really about religion but about good manners. You will never find a devout middle class Iranian or Egyptian man or middle class European convert to Islam who has a disrespectful attitude toward women. Their families have brought them up to have good manners.

But when it comes to Muslim men who have never learned good manners, for them religion often becomes an arena for what we might call “virtue signalling”, where outward appearances of faith make up most of what matters to them. To such men it is “obvious” that there is something wrong with a woman who fails to engage in the virtue signalling that they think is so important, and so they criticize her.

And it is not just a problem with men. I have often heard Muslim women criticize other women in a similar manner. Generally if a man is the type of person to do that, the women in his family will also do it. The problem is with the entire family’s manners.

Your low iman may actually be depression

assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh brother I hope you are well in sha Allah. I have recently been experiencing very low imaan, to the point where I no longer feel like praying. I don't know why but my salah feels empty, there's been a couple of times where I've purposely missed my prayers. I don't even make dua anymore either and this worries me. What can I do to fix this? I'm scared of displeasing Allah but at the same time I don't want to pray I just have to force myself.

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh,

In my experience when Muslims speak of “low iman” it is not actually a problem with their faith, it is just that they are depressed and their depression makes them feel abandoned and unspiritual.

If you think you are depressed, then remind yourself that it is your psychology that has changed, not your relationship with God. Even if you get no satisfaction out of the acts of worship, continue to perform them as a proof of your faith in God. It is good to worship God when it makes you feel good. But it is even better to worship Him when you have to force yourself to do it, because remaining steadfast despite difficulties and turmoil is what distinguishes the best believers from the average ones.

If you feel as if God dislikes you and has turned away from you then realize that this is just your depression making you think these thoughts. Always think of God the way He describes Himself (the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful), regardless of how you feel. A saint is just someone who has reached a state where nothing that God does to them will reduce their love for Him. Even though they know that God is fully in charge of the universe, when they suffer they do not blame God for it and they never think negative thoughts about Him. They keep facing Him and striving toward Him regardless of what storms He sends their way, knowing that He is only giving them opportunities to prove their love for Him.

For more on getting back on the right track when you feel that your faith is low please see my essay: God has not abandoned you

You may also be interested in my essay:  Islam and Depression: A Survival Guide

The morality of sharing music on social media

Assalamualaikum, I saw a thread on twitter that said things like sharing music for example is a sin that will accumulate even after you die? Because people will still listen or share it once you're gone and you're responsible for that. Atm I follow the consensus that listening to music as long as it's not excessive or dirty is fine. But what is your thoughts on this? What hadiths are there about sins which carry on after you die? Jzk

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

The Quran says:

So let them carry their loads complete on the Day of Resurrection, and some of the loads of those they misguided without knowledge. Evil is what they carry.

The Prophet repeats the same message in this hadith:

He who called (people) to righteousness, there would be reward (assured) for him like the rewards of those who adhered to it, without their rewards being diminished in any respect. And he who called (people) to error, he shall have to carry (the burden) of its sin, like those who committed it, without their sins being diminished in any respect. (Sahih Muslim 2674)

As far as I can find there are no explicit hadiths that deal with the issue of sins that continue to harm a person after death. But from the above, and from narrations that talk about good deeds that continue to benefit a person’s record after death, scholars conclude that bad deeds that continue to exert their efforts after one’s death will continue to harm that person’s record too.

Music is merely a set of ordered sounds, similar to speech (and similar to the songs of birds). And similar to speech, it is neither good nor bad by itself. It is only once we examine its purposes, effects and uses that we can decide whether it is a good thing or bad thing. Sharing music on social media is therefore similar to sharing anything else, such as a speech, picture or quotation.

Music that is beautiful (such as some classical Western or Middle Eastern music) carries a positive value according to Islamic aesthetics, meaning that it is not just morally neutral, it is morally good and beneficial. (See my essay Beauty as Pointer: An Islamic Theory of Aesthetics). There is also music that is neutral or negative in its value. Most pop music combines both music and poetry of negative value to create a message that positively goes against a pious and God-fearing state of mind.

There are also types of music that serve a utilitarian purpose, such as upbeat music for exercising. There is nothing wrong with that.

For more on music please see my article: Listening to Music is Permissible in Islam

What is the best way to avoid habitual sins?

Assalamu’alaykum, I wanna ask how to find myself and get back on the right path back? Im lost. Like so lost. Ive been feeling so tired with life and everything but i still keep on sinning. Like why is it so hard for me to understand that this life is temporary. Im sorry im emotional. I just needed to let this thing out. Can you please make dua for me. I just want to be a good servant of Allah ((you dont have to reply)) thank you. May Allah bless you.

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

You cannot stop sinning just by wishing for it or by trying to use your willpower. That never works. You must instead try to become the type of person who needs no effort to avoid sins. And this can only be achieved by setting aside an hour or so every day for extra worship (Quran-reading and praying).

Being unable to stop sinning is a sign that you are distant from God. The sinning is just a sign of a bigger problem. And the solution is to come closer to God. Once you achieve this, you will automatically avoid sinful things without having to think about it. Stop worrying about sins (God forgives all sins) and start worrying about your relationship with God.

For more details please see my essay God has not abandoned you

Best wishes.

Can one unknowingly associate partners with God?

Salam, I asked about the false idols. Sorry if you already explained this in the first answer, but I was reading commentary of Surah Baqarah v22 which mentions false idols. It says "Will you still resist and go after your false gods, the creation of your own fancy? The false gods may be idols, superstistions, self or even glorious things like Poetry, Art or Science. When set up as rivals to Allah" Does this mean as long as it doesnt interfere with religious duties you can still love such things?—and just to add on to the false idols questions how can you be sure you’re not setting up rivals to Allah swt unknowingly? Jazak Allah Khairun.

—and just to add on to the false idols questions how can you be sure you’re not setting up rivals to Allah swt unknowingly? Jazak Allah Khairun.

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

The Quran says:

Be pious according to the best of your ability. (The Quran, verse 64:16)

The Quran never asks us to be super-human. It acknowledges our humanity while always asking us aim for a higher ideal.

Thinking in terms of whether you are setting up rivals to God or not, as if it is an either/or situation, is an incorrect way of thinking. You should think of the matters in terms of how close to God you are or how faraway you are from Him. It is not a black and white issue, it is a spectrum. The closer you are to God, the less important worldly concerns become, while the more distant you are from God, the more important the worldly life becomes until, at some point, one can honestly say that you are setting up rivals to God, for example by worshiping fame or money.

It is also important to keep in mind that God guides those who sincerely seek Him. Some people mistakenly think that since there are a million ways one could go wrong and only one “truth”, this must mean that being rightly guided is extremely difficult and unlikely. The reality is quite the opposite. God exists, He is present in our lives, and every day He presents us with dozens of opportunities to come closer to Him. At the beginning of every book of Quran we see this verse:

This is the Book in which there is no doubt, a guide for the righteous. (The Quran, verse 2:2)

This verse makes it sound like you need to be righteous first before you can be guided by the Quran. Many verses make similar statements, for example:

and He guides to Himself whoever repents. (The Quran, verse 13:27)

The truth is that the more you try to be good, the more God increases you in guidance by causing you to run into exactly the right circumstances or individuals to help you come even closer to Him.

Setting up rivals to God is not like a well that you can fall into when you are not looking. If you are always trying to stay close to God and seek Him with all your heart, then you can be assured that He will not let you unknowingly fall into a gross error like worshiping something besides Him without realizing it. Every effort you make toward Him will by rewarded by Him with an increase in your knowledge and guidance. God is like a mentor who constantly teaches us and correct us, every hour of every day.

Best wishes.

The Muslim view of Orientalists

Brother, I've heard that orientalists are westerners studying Islam and their purpose is to cause distortion of knowledge among people about Islam. My question is, what orientalists really are and for what purpose do they study Islam? Thank you.

“Orientalist” is a word that was used to refer to Western scholars of Islam until the middle of the 20th century. It is true that some Orientalists had negative views of Muslims and this affected their research. But on the whole, Orientalists were like any group of Western academics (social scientists, historians), trying to objectively study Islam. The work of Orientalists was perhaps the greatest contribution to the field of Islamic studies in the 20th century. They helped solve various mysteries that Islamic scholars had not solved, for example the origins of the Islamic schools of thought (madhhabs).

Orientalists like Ignaz Goldziher (d. 1921) and Joseph Schacht (d. 1969) had a low opinion of Islamic scholars and they believed that the vast majority of authentic hadith narrations were fabricated by them. Their theories upset many Islamic scholars and made them think there was some sort of conspiracy against Islam (especially since Goldziher was Jewish). Regardless of their motivations, since they were working within a Western academic field, the field continued to develop and refine its theories, so that by 2000 the theory of widespread fabrication of hadith was disproven by other Orientalists (who are no longer called Orientalists), especially the scholar Harald Motzki.

Louis Massignon

The French Orientalist Louis Massignon (1883 – 1962), a Catholic priest, was one of the greatest servants of the Islamic scholarly tradition in the 20th century and worked hard to increase Western respect for Islam. His students include important Islamic scholars and thinkers like Muhammad Abdullah Draz and Ali Shariati, and important Western scholars like George Makdisi who continued his tradition of respecting Islam and Muslims.

So it is unjust to color all Orientalists with the same brush. They were humans with different motivations, but the majority were trying to be objective in their study of Islam.

Additionally, their Western method of study is extremely valuable because it helps encourage balanced and objective discussion of the issues. Their method of study is now being adopted by Islamic scholars throughout the world since it is so valuable. In the past scholars from one school would often refuse to study the works of other schools and would defend their own ideas even if there was evidence that contradicted them. But the Western method of study, which requires publishing one’s ideas in papers that are peer-reviewed by other scholars, makes it impossible to defend false ideas for very long.

In this way, today’s Western field of Islamic studies, which was established by the Orientalists, is helping make the life of Islamic scholars much easier because their research is so objective and high in quality. Examples are the works of Frank Griffel and Kenneth Garden on Imam al-Ghazali, which have helped completely change how we understand this important scholar (they show that he was not against philosophy, quite the opposite).

How to pray the witr prayer

Salam, could you please explain how witr namaz is prayed and what is meant to be recited in each rakat? Because of my lack of understanding I don't pray it and therefore being sinful.

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

The witr prayer is not obligatory, so it is not sinful if you do not perform it. It is a voluntary prayer that you can perform as your last prayer of the night. You can perform it exactly the way you perform the evening (maghrib) prayer (3 rakats, you do not have to say or do anything special during it—this is the Hanafi view). For more details and for the views of other schools please see this answer on IslamOnline.net (view as a PDF).

On the hadiths of the punishment of image-makers (al-muṣawwirūn)

Salam, Im so glad youre answering questions again. I just wanted to ask how can I reconcile the hadith “The most severely punished people o‎n the Day of Resurrection would be the image-makers (al-musawwiroon).” [Al-Bukhaaree 7/540, no.834; Muslim 3/1161, no.5272, 5270] with the scholarly view point that drawing living things is permissible?

Due to the scarcity of the textual evidence, there is no consensus on what the Prophet may have meant when he used the word al-muṣawwirūn (image-makers). Some scholars, such as al-Nawawī, interpret it as meaning that all images of living things are forbidden, while others (such as al-Ṭabarī) interpret it as referring to pictures and statues intended for worship. Modern scholars who have looked at the evidence have noted that there are narrations where the Prophet approves of putting images of living things on cushions and garments and approves of dolls, including a toy horse with wings, therefore many have concluded that only items intended for worship are forbidden.

For a longer discussion please see this article: A Traditionalist Critique of the Islamic Prohibition on Taṣwīr

Islam’s ruling on cannibalism for survival

What does islam Tell us about cannibalism. considering that one is trapped and can only eat a dead person. such as the crash of the aircraft Fuerza-Aérea-Uruguaya-Flug 571. Thank you for your answer. May Allah bless you

The Quran says in regards to eating prohibited things:

But if one is forced by necessity, without willful disobedience, nor transgressing due limits,- then God is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (From verse 16:115)

Eating prohibited things for survival is therefore allowable when forced by necessity, and this would apply to what you mentioned.

Is it permissible to draw and paint in Islam?

I read your essay on the permissibility of drawing but I'm still a little confused. Is it okay to draw (animals, people etc) as long as you don't put it up on walls? As to show it off/be proud/or idolise it? - and how can this be connected to social media, drawings should not be shared online? Jazak Allah Khairun for your time and effort

The mainstream view (that of the scholars of al-Azhar University) is that drawing and making statues of living things is permissible as long as it is not something that is worshiped religiously or that contains features that conflict with Islam’s teachings.

So the general rule is that when it comes to drawing, painting and making statues, everything is permitted. Then exceptions are made for things that conflict with Islam’s teachings, such as statues of deities, or paintings depicting nudity (unless there is a reason to justify them, so a drawing of a naked person in a medical textbook is completely fine). So the mainstream Islamic view is the common sense view that there is nothing intrinsically wrong with paintings and statues. You can share drawings and paintings online without issue.

Additionally, even if something is wrong with a drawing, painting or statue, we are not required to destroy them. We see this in the example of the Egyptian relics. Muslims have ruled that country for about 1400 years and many of the Companions of the Prophet resided there, yet all the paintings and statues of Egyptian deities remain intact. The Muslims felt no need or desire whatsoever to destroy them and instead appreciated them as reminders of Egypt’s history. The Taliban’s destruction of Afghanistan’s relics was in accordance with their Saudi-taught Wahhabi ideology not in accordance with the views of the majority of Islamic scholars.

Feeling lonely and incomplete despite praying and reading Quran

I have a hole in my heart and I try to fill it with any attachments with anyone or even watching a tv or some series ,, I pray and I read QuranI but I still feel the hole all the time which make me attach to people and then break my heart,, what can I do?!

Humans are social creatures and need the love and support of their fellow humans. Almost no one can make religion replace this. Religion is not there to be a replacement for your humanity, it is there to reform it. None of the Prophets, peace be upon them, lived in loneliness and isolation. They were surrounded by loving families and friends.

What you seem to need is more human contact and love. You will invariably suffer letdowns and disappointments, but that is in the nature of this world. There is no way to buy an insurance policy against suffering. Regardless of what we do, we will invariably go through periods of hardship and period of ease, periods of feeling loved and periods of feeling abandoned. Spirituality can help provide a balancing factor that prevents the changes and hardships of life from overwhelming you, but it cannot stop you from being influenced by them.

What you can do is continue praying and reading Quran, and when suffering comes your way, accept it as God’s decree and know that it will not last forever.

Can you remain in contact with a relative who left Islam?

Salaam. my aunt left Islam. She says bad things about Islam and sometimes wants to challenge me academically but I don't have adequate knowledge so I ended up more doubtful. As my aunt she cares about me and she's nice to me. I had a lot of issues with my computer back then went I was writing my thesis and she bought me battery abroad when I couldn't find the model here. And when my salary wasn't out she bought me clothes. And now she gave me money. //1

She has helped me financially when I needed it the most. But I’m wondering can we accept gifts or money from people who leaves Islam? I didn’t give back her stuff or say no thank you partially because it’s very disrespectful in my culture and to not cause issues in the family as the family ties are strong here. But also because I needed at those times. I had to write my thesis etc . Should I give sadaqa the money and the gifts? //2

She has helped me financially when I needed it the most. But I’m wondering can we accept gifts or money from people who leaves Islam? I didn’t give back her stuff or say no thank you partially because it’s very disrespectful in my culture and to not cause issues in the family as the family ties are strong here. But also because I needed at those times. I had to write my thesis etc . Should I give sadaqa the money and the gifts? //2

Islam forbids entering into a relationship of wilāya with such a person, but it does not forbid maintaining a polite relationship with them or accepting help and gifts from them. To clarify this, here are the relevant verses from the Quran:

O you who believe! Do not ally yourselves (wilāya) with your parents and your siblings if they prefer disbelief to belief. Whoever of you allies himself with them—these are the wrongdoers. (Verse 9:23)

We have advised the human being to be good to his parents. But if they urge you to associate with Me something you have no knowledge of, do not obey them. To Me is your return; and I will inform you of what you used to do. (Verse 29:8)

1. O you who believe! Do not take My enemies and your enemies for supporters (wilāya), offering them affection, when they have disbelieved in what has come to you of the Truth. They have expelled the Messenger, and you, because you believed in God, your Lord. If you have mobilized to strive for My cause, seeking My approval, how can you secretly love them? I know what you conceal and what you reveal. Whoever among you does that has strayed from the right way.2. Whenever they encounter you, they treat you as enemies, and they stretch their hands and tongues against you with malice. They wish that you would disbelieve… 8. As for those who have not fought against you for your religion, nor expelled you from your homes, God does not prohibit you from dealing with them kindly and equitably. God loves the equitable.9. But God prohibits you from befriending (wilāya) those who fought against you over your religion, and expelled you from your homes, and aided in your expulsion. Whoever takes them for friends—these are the wrongdoers. (Verses 60:1-2 and 8-9)

The term wilāya has no exact equivalent in English. It means to make someone your friend, patron and protector. It involves physical and emotional dependence and submission toward the person for your social status, safety and protection. God forbids us from entering into such a relationship with someone who dislikes our religion and hopes to one day make us disbelievers like themselves. Your aunt appears to fit this description, therefore the Quran’s guidance on this matter is to not make them your patron and protector. But you can still maintain polite relations with them and accept their help and gifts. What is forbidden is becoming dependent on them and submitting to them, everything else is left to your own discretion.

Coworker encourages them to sin

Assalamu Alaikum, How do we deal with human evil ? My "muslim" co-worker knows I'm still a virgin and that I don't eat pork and non-halal stuff ( Pretty logical for a muslim right ? ) but he's kind of teasing me and asking me if I want to eat the pork or drink bear "because I live in the west now" :/ if I didn't need the Job so much, I'd quit but I can't ... I'm proud for staying true to the religion but sometimes I regret moving to the west because of people like him ...

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

Just ignore it if you can, and if he persists, you can write him a long email explaining that you take that as harassment and ask him to stop. And if that does not help, you can threaten to escalate it to the company’s human resources department. Some companies will take that type of behavior very seriously and will reprimand him for it.

What should a Muslim woman do if she feels more attracted to women than men?

I know you get lots of questions like these but, gonna ask anyways, I've been trying to deal with it on my own but I think I need help, I'm a woman and I feel attraction towards women ( and men as well but not as strongly ) I've been trying to distance myself from all things 'gay', if I'm being honest a few months ago I was ready to just ignore that part of our religion, and Allah swt put me back on the straight path, but it's such a struggle, do you have any advice ? :/

Your situation is similar to a man being in love with another man’s wife. His desire for her is natural, but God’s commandments make it impossible for him to get satisfaction in that way, so that he has to settle for another woman that he may not like as much. In your case too, you can settle for men even if women are your first choice, it may not feel ideal, but nothing in life is. There are many people who are not fully satisfied in their married life for one reason or another, so if you were to marry a man and you have a reasonably functional marriage, you would be just as happy as most people in their marriages.

You can check out the Islam and homosexuality page on my site for many other articles that explain Islam’s stance it.

The difference between tahajjud and qiyam al-layl

Salam. Brother, I have learned that if we want to pray tahajjud, we have to get some sleep first. If we do it right after 'isha prayer before sleep, it is only called qiyamul lail. Does that not count as tahajjud, even if our niyah is to pray tahajjud?

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

Tahajjud means “to keep vigil”, to avoid sleep for the sake of something. Qiyām al-layl means “staying up at night”. Linguistically the two have the same meaning, but some scholars choose to differentiate between them, reserving the word tahajjud for interrupting one’s sleep to pray, while considering qiyām al-layl to refer to praying without going to sleep at all.

I use tahajjud to refer to giving up sleep or rest for the sake of worship regardless of whether one has already slept or not. According to the scholar al-Mawardi (d. 1058 CE) this is a valid usage of the word tahajjud and it is the first opinion he mentions about it (in his commentary on verse 17:79, at volume 3, p. 264 of the Dar al-Kutub version of his tafsir).

The two terms can be considered synonymous since there is no compelling evidence in the Quran or the Sunnah to differentiate between them. Since tahajjud means “keeping vigil”, any form of keeping vigil for worship can be considered to fall underneath it. Some scholars prefer to differentiate between qiyām al-layl and tahajjud and they are free to have that opinion. In my view it is not important what we call it, the point is staying up at night for worship.

What is Islam’s punishment for premarital sexual intercourse?

Hello. What are the punishment for not waiting until marriage ?

If you are speaking of punishments administered by an Islamic legal system, in the overwhelming majority of cases there would be no punishment because people are encouraged to keep their sex lives private even if it is sinful. If they are discovered by their families, their families are also encouraged to keep things private and to forgive them and let them go on with their lives like normal if they repent and to not make it public.

Legal punishments only happen in the case of someone flagrantly airing their sex lives in public; if a person is discovered in the act of copulation by four witnesses and 2. there is a legal system in the country or state that enforces Islamic law and 3. the four people choose to testify in court against them rather than keeping silent, then those convicted would be publicly flogged then let go to go on with their lives. This means that the Islamic legal system ends up dealing almost entirely with cases of prostitution, rape and what may be called debauchery (orgies, etc.) rather than cases involving normal people’s lives, which are left to people’s own discretion.

If you were asking about God’s punishment for a person who engages in premarital sexual relationships, then it is sufficient for them to repent and stop doing it for them to be forgiven (as explained here).

Will God’s forgiveness allow someone to get away with their crimes?

(1/2) Narcissist they harm ppl and are ignorant how can they just go to heaven ? I know it’s a disorder so Allah forgives them. But bc I’m a victim of verbal abuse It led me to have severe depression & psychosis, almost killed myself twice despite months being broken up this year. He was a boyfriend & we had sex so is it been all my fault for how I let him come into my life and asked for it at 16 when he was 19.

(2/2) I’m 18 now and I hope Allah forgives me for being naive being so young but for him is it fine for what he was?

God judges each person according to what He has given them and according to their natural abilities and weaknesses. In the story of Moses, Pharaoh was a narcissist and he was punished terribly by God.

What you should keep in mind is that God is far wiser, more intelligent and more fair and just than you, so you should never worry about Him allowing someone to get away with their crimes.

42. Do not ever think that God is unaware of what the wrongdoers do. He only defers them until a Day when the sights stare.

43. Their necks outstretched, their heads upraised, their gaze unblinking, their hearts void.

44. And warn mankind of the Day when the punishment will come upon them, and the wicked will say, “Our Lord, defer us for a little while, and we will answer Your call and follow the messengers.” Did you not swear before that there will be no passing away for you? (The Quran, verses 14:42-44)

While God is merciful and forgiving, He is also just. He deals with each human exactly as they deserve, giving them a thousand chances to come back to Him, to repent and to become better people. But if they constantly reject God’s promptings, every day until the day they die, then they will be outside God’s mercy by their own choice that they repeatedly made on a daily basis for decades on end.

It is never good for your heart and soul to hope for bad things and punishments to happen to others, even if they deserve it. Ignore them for your own good, you deserve to have a calm and pure heart that does not dwell on negative things. And the way to achieve such a heart is to do sufficient worship daily to remain close to God at all times (as I explain in this essay).

Best wishes.

She is engaged to someone but wishes to marry someone else

1 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatu. I am facing a very difficult dilemma at the moment. A few months ago, a cousin of mine asked for my hand in marriage. I was extremely shocked because I never thought of him in that way and I didn’t know he felt anything for me either but apparently he’s liked me for a very long time. Although we are cousins we never really spent much time together so I didn’t know much about him. My initial reaction to the question was leaning towards - cont next ask

2 no but my parents encouraged me otherwise because he is a good person, doesn’t have a bad history and to top it off he is my cousin so we did not want to make anything awkward or uncomfortable in our family. I decided to say yes because like I said I didn’t know much about him so it didn’t feel fair for me to say no without even giving him a chance. Things could possibly work out I thought. However I am having second thoughts now 🙁 I do not feel like I am in love with him.. cont

3 love for him but I feel like it’s brotherly love. On top of that, I think I am in love with someone else. I’ve always felt a connection with this person since we were small. We grew up together and I always thought we’d end up together but when my cousin proposed I didn’t think I had a chance with my childhood crush.. but now even though I’m engaged I still can’t get him off my mind. My heart is still drawn to him and I have no idea what to do. I feel like my love for my childhood - cont

4 crush is not allowing me to give my fiancé the love and attention he deserves. I’m scared to hurt him and my family by breaking things off but he deserves to be with someone who loves him just as much as he loves them. I really need some advice. I am scared that my parents, his parents, and most importantly Allah swt will not forgive me if I break things off.. I know divorce is permissible in Islam but it is frowned upon.. please help me. Thank you (sorry for the long ask)

Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,

That is a difficult situation and there does not seem to be any entirely satisfactory decision to be made. All of us at one time or another will face similar circumstances where there are seemingly no right choices.

If you choose to break off the relationship for the sake of your own happiness, this can greatly harm your family’s relationship with his family, and your own relationship with your family, without it being guaranteed that it will bring you what you desire, since the person you desire may or may not marry you. It is therefore a very risky decision. And if you go through with the planned marriage, while you do not feel any love toward him right now, love can develop down the road.

I cannot tell you what decision to make, since in the end you will have to accept the responsibility for either decision. But if I were in your situation, I would delay the wedding if possible while constantly praying for God’s help and guidance, and I would spend at least an hour in extra worship every day (as explained here). Situations that seem impossibly difficult and complicated today can be made easy and simple for us by God if we prove our loyalty and dedication to Him. He says in the Quran:

And whoever has taqwā (fears God and remains mindful of Him)—He will make a way out for him. And will provide for him from where he never expected. Whoever relies on God—He will suffice him. (From the verses 65:2-3)

So rely on God in this difficulty and every other difficulty and inshaAllah He will make a way for you one way or another.

Laughter in dreams and menstruation

In response to Did Abraham’s wife Sarah laugh at the destruction of Lot’s people?

Laughter in a dream can be interpreted as menstruation and I have certainly found this happening, especially when I think that I am not menstruating, but the dream appears as a vision to warn me that I am--laughter can thus be interpreted as menstruation because Lot's wife laughed because had suddenly begun menstruating, after menopause. This is one of the possible interpretations!!

That is possible. However, in the field of Quranic exegesis interpretations have to rely on either on textual evidence (verses of the Quran, hadith and athar) or on scientific evidence. Dream interpretation can only be admitted if there are Quranic verses or hadith narrations mentioning that seeing such a thing in a dream has such a meaning. If we ourselves relate menstruation and laughter through personal experience but this is not mentioned in Quranic verses or narrations, then it cannot be used to interpret the verse. If someone does a large-scale scientific study of women’s dreams and discovers a strong correlation between laughter in dreams and menstruation in the real world, then this too can be admitted as evidence to interpret the verse.

Also, note that the story related to Abraham’s wife not Lot’s wife.

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