Salam! Do you have advice on how to not pity oneself. I didn’t realize how much I actually do this and how it goes on to affect the way I interpret my daily life and past.
Alaikumassalam wa rahmatullah,
I believe the cure is to have a very firm belief in the fact that God is in charge of the universe, that nothing happens to us without His allowing it, and that He is just, kind and merciful and always gives us what we need for our growth and maturation. However merely recognizing these things intellectually is not enough. One also needs to keep the recognition alive in the heart, otherwise self-pity (and all kinds of other negative character traits) always creep back regardless of how wise and saintly we are at the moment. We need to do constant, daily work to maintain our balance, and the best way to do that is to read the Quran daily.